If you want some style inspiration, check out my friend’s blog/website: shellchicd.com. From her bubbly personality and her remarkable fashion sense to her amazing dance skills and love for books, she is pretty awesome! Plus, she probably owns just as much Lilly Pulitzer as me… needless to say, I’m a big fan and you should be too!
— Amy Benson, Last sentence of The Sparkling-Eyed Boy
I. I remember the awkward pauses in between stories. We bowed our heads, looked away from each other, and tipped the beer cans to our lips before somebody shared another memory. And we stayed like that, the dozen of us, for hours. Despite the unusual circumstances, I felt lucky – lucky to be there, lucky to be a part of this amazing group of guys, and lucky to have known the person we all came for.
II. The suburban street was deserted, the air was brisk, and the grass was unusually healthy. The anger and the tears, they poured out of him for the first time, and I was speechless. I don’t remember what I finally said, but I know it came out all wrong. I just remember the way he shook when I hugged him and the way the crumpled beer can landed on the neighbor’s front lawn when he threw it.
III. She had this untouchable warmth about her – the way she breathed, the way she smiled, and the way she embraced me, a total stranger; but to her, a family friend. I don’t remember her crying. Maybe she did, but I don’t remember it. I remember her honest words, her acceptance, and her spirit. It was her faith that impressed me. There was no anger, no regret.
IV. It was a sunny October day and the four of them stood over the open ground. They bowed their heads to look down at their friend. I felt like an intruder watching their heartache from a distance. They stood there - thinking, praying, grieving - as I tucked my cold hands into the pockets of my spring jacket and looked down at my heels as they sunk into the dirt.
V. Well this road I’m on’s gonna turn to sand and leave me lost in a far off land. So let me ride the wind til I don’t look back, forget the life that I almost had…
Peter Bradley, Longer I Run
I boarded the plane without a seat assignment. When I chose my seat, my brother happened to be there. Another passenger leaned over to say that the maid (yep, he said maid) had a twin sister. My brother and I watched in awe when the stewardess approached us.
“There’s two of them? This is going to be so weird!” we said, as if identical twins were a phenomenon. Just as the lights started to dim, I noticed there was a side compartment attached to the plane. Apparently that’s where the stewardesses and their families stayed. Suddenly, a group of little kids stepped out of the extra compartment and walked along the wing into the main area of the plane.
My brother and I gasped, afraid they might fall off. One of the twins came up to us as her young daughter (maybe 1.5 years old) crawled on the floor beside us. She was adorable, but when she opened her mouth, she had a full mouth of adult teeth. It wasn’t unattractive, but it was obviously unusual.
“Feel them,” the stewardess said, “they’re very tough.” She pushed her hand against the baby’s jaw so I leaned over and did the same. She was right, she had a very strong jaw.
Then the woman said, “you’ll be appalled to hear what we did this morning.” And then suddenly, as the woman explained, my brother and I were taken to the edge of the plane where there was an open staircase leading to an ocean. Apparently we were on a plane/boat.
The woman, her husband, and her young baby were sitting on the staircase as the water swished between the stairs. My brother and I were sitting at the bottom with our legs dangling off the side. “We throw the random bugs, fish, and jelly fish back,” she said as her hands reached into the water to pull out a drifting fish, as if they swam along the top of the ocean. I could feel the shivers crawl up my body. The whole idea made me cringe as I watched her young child smiling, her hands reaching into the cold water.
Then I awoke to my roommate’s alarm. Only when I realized it was all a dream, I also realized my roommate wasn’t home so I crawled out of bed and went into her cold room to turn off the alarm. And that’s how my day started…
Since I’ve been asked to write a post on sex (and first times), let’s start with a simple fact.
Sex is personal.
I don’t care what your friends say, what the media says, or what other peers have said. Sex is always personal. And it’s always your choice. If you’re not ready to have sex, then don’t. Simple as that. I’ll answer some basic questions…
1. How do you know if you’re ready to have sex?
You won’t know, not really. There’s no sign telling you what’s right and what’s wrong. Although, if you’re gut’s telling you to wait, then always trust your gut. Always! You don’t want to regret it, trust me. It doesn’t matter how old you are, how many boyfriends you’ve had or not had. I had long term boyfriends (2 years long) and we never had sex—and it didn’t impede our relationship. It’s your choice, nobody else’s.
2. What about the guy?
Let me put it this way: if a guy likes you, he will wait with you. He may not like it, but he’ll wait. And he’ll be patient and he won’t pressure you. I can tell you from experience that there are guys like this out there. These guys are rare, but they’re out there. Look for that guy and make sure he’s interested in you first and foremost.
3. What if you think he’s the one?
I think the concept of “the one” is difficult to understand. Personally, I think we could be head-over-heels in love with many different people and even if we’re meant for just one person on this planet, we many never meet that person. That being said, you shouldn’t just have sex with a guy because you think he “could be” the one. Make sure you trust the guy. Make sure he’ll stick around after you have sex. And make sure he really cares about you. Ideally, you want it to be with a guy you’re in love with and vice versa.
4. Do people actually wait until marriage?
Yes, they do. Not everybody is having sex! Two of my college friends waited and are both happily married and starting families of their own. It’s not a crazy idea. Nobody will judge you for waiting. In fact, many people are impressed by those who can wait.
5. What am I really saying?
Sex is personal and it’s your choice. Think strongly about it before you do it. I waited a long time, much longer than the majority of my friends and I’m very glad I did. And when you decide to have sex because you’re ready and you’ve met the right guy (assuming you’re in a relationship or married), make sure you’re protected.
Anonymous asked: can u do a post on sex. how do you know when its the right time/ who to chose to do it w, etc
"Lent stimulates us to let the Word of God penetrate our life and in this way to know the fundamental truth: who we are, where we come from, where we must go, what path we must take in life…" - Pope Benedict XVI
It’s officially Ash Wednesday and the start of lent! That means it’s time to reflect on ourselves, our choices, and our spirituality. This year, in particular, I’ll need to make a big choice: where am I going to school in the fall? I’ve already been accepted to MFA programs and I’m hoping to have an answer by Easter.
I’m also going to try and be more proactive. What does that mean? It means working out more, writing more, going to church, helping others (volunteering, day-to-day kindness), and being more grateful. Oh, and I’ll also give up meat on Fridays and cut out sweets from my diet (except ice cream. Sorry I’m not sorry).
Here we go… 40 days & 40 nights.
- Pay attention to your city.
Every day, you take the same path to and from work. There’s so much beauty around you. Do you ever stop to notice? Yesterday, I was walking through the Boston Commons just as the sun was setting – the yellow light highlighted the top of the Park Street Church and it was absolutely breathtaking.
- Focus on fashion.
Yes, it’s still snowy and cold in March, but that doesn’t mean you have to keep wearing grey and black. Wear a flowered dress over your leggings. Put on bright pink lipstick. Paint your nails blue. Dress the way you’d like to feel – choose bright, warm, and beautiful colors.
- Be considerate.
Maybe you give up your seat to an older woman, maybe you offer to pay for somebody’s coffee, or maybe you open the door for somebody (ok, you should always do that). It not only feels good to be generous, but you’ll be surprised how grateful strangers will be.
- Listen to Pandora.
Broaden your musical repertoire and learn new songs. You’ll be amazed by how many new artists and songs you’ll discover—and love!
- Take a walk.
If work is overwhelming, stressful, or boring, step away. Go outside (but make sure you wear a jacket, gloves, and hat) and take a walk. Take a path you don’t normally take and breathe in the cool air.
- Try new dishes.
Go to a new restaurant or a new café. Try the blueberry coffee or the rabbit pasta you’ve been wondering about. Look up recipes on pinterest and test them out. The results may surprise—and inspire you.
- Listen to others.
If you’re looking for inspiration, you’ll always find it in others. Ask people questions; find out what motivates them, what they’re passionate about, and what makes them happy. I promise you’ll be inspired by their excitement. My best inspiration comes from the people I love.
- Read more.
Words will inspire you. Read blog posts, magazines, articles, essays, and books.
- Do something different.
Do something you don’t normally do. Go to the flower shop and buy yourself flowers. Buy a new colorful scarf to add to your wardrobe. Meet an old friend for dinner. Volunteer at a local charity. Start a blog. Take a cooking class. Join a gym. Go to the ballet. Just be creative and pro-active in your day-to-day life.
|Mom:||Guess what I heard on the radio? It's Dr. Seuss's birthday today! Let's celebrate by reading something by him.|
|Child:||Is he going to have a party?|
|Mom:||Well, probably lots of people will be having parties in his honor. He's dead but his work lives on in his books.|
|Child:||Why he died?|
|Mom:||Well, everyone dies; we can't live forever. He was old. But, as I said, he lives on in all his wonderful books!|
|Child:||He dead. Dr. Seuss is dead. Why?|
|Mom:||I just told you, honey--|
|Child:||He dead but he still has a mouth to eat cake with.|
I had $5 – enough for two trips on the subway. I tapped my fingers to the dirty screen and slid my crinkled dollar bills into the machine. All the while, I noticed a confused man behind me. He had a $10 bill dangling from his fingertips and a Charlie card in his palm. He was fumbling with the money as he glanced at the machine next to me which read: NO CASH.
“You have to use this one,” I said aloud and he nodded. When my Charlie card popped out of the machine, I started to walk away, but heard the man behind me say: “excuse me.” I turned around.
“Can you help me?” he asked. It was obvious based on his appearance, his accent, and his lack of knowledge that he was a foreigner. I returned to the machine and took his Charlie card and pressed it to the machine. I went through the instructions and let him know when it was time to enter the cash. When it was complete, he thanked me and off I went. Of course, I missed the subway by 10 seconds.
Later on, when I returned to the subway to go home, I slid my pass into the machine, but it beeped at me and read: “See agent.” I tried again. Nothing. I was about to miss another subway. A young guy on the other side said, “come on through,” but I couldn’t. He walked onto the cart and the doors closed. The subway buzzed past.
I glanced behind me, hoping there was a machine to fill my Charlie card, but there wasn’t. A young woman who was on her way out of the subway station turned back and said, “you can use mine.” She took a Charlie card out of her purse and tapped it against the machine so the doors opened. Obviously I thanked her.
And that, my friends, is karma for you.